The Slut Pandemic

Thursday, April 30, 2009

The Slut Pandemic - 2008 - Present

The H1N1 Influenza is on the news lately. Lot of people using the word "Pandemic". Many didnt even know what the fuck a "pandemic" was. Epidemic? No. Pandemic? Oh!.But for years there has been another pandemic ravaging our nation and the world. Im talking of the "Slut Pandemic". A silent disease that spreads like wildfire but the symtoms are highly noticeable. Any nightclub is ground zero. Every single country in the world is infected.Its a terrible "disease". It starts with music. Maybe a music video. Perhaps watching a movie. It seems to affect women ages 13-30 years old. The disease doesnt discriminate, it hits all races, all social classes. The victim, watches a movie, perhaps hears a song. For example "Blame it on the alcohol". Sounds like a "Guy" song (Song speaks of getting girls drunk and fucking them)But more and more females are heard singing the song, in clubs, bars, restaurants, parties, any place really with a close proximity to Alcohol.But as of late, cases of Slut-enza are multiplying. By the millions. Its exact origin is unknown, perhaps the United States, with a high number of confirmed Slut cases. Perhaps a nightclub in any big city in the U.S. It later spread to other countries.Symptoms are but not limited to: False sense of independence, erroneous belief that having many lovers makes one independent and not a slut, the more alcohol ingested the more the disease spreads.Experts urge extreme caution. They advice that using common sense can prevent a female from becoming infected with Slut-enza. Practicing Common Sense in public venues, not ingesting exageratted amounts of alcohol that will cloud judgement and thinking, and having a dose of Self Respect. Strong Will Power is also a known antivirus.Those who fall ill with Slut-enza report that after ingesting many Adios Mothafuckers (a common catalyst for Slut-enza) they report symptoms of stupidity and bad judgement. Next morning is followed by feelings of embarrassment and regret. Slut-enza tends to pop up again and again, many days a month. Even though victims would like to be cured, they tend to have a relapse and Slut-enza spreads.There ARE cures and the world is working on a vaccination to forever rid the world of this terrible plague. The most common cure is called Self Respect. Not readily available for everyone but experts say it works against the silent pandemic ravaging our towns, cities and villages.These past few years the cases have been multiplying and spreading, it has become more noticeable. But experts say this pandemic has been going on for years. One only hopes that those affected will reach a dose of Self Respect.Before they succumb totally to the Slut Pandemic. And it will be too late.